I haven’t been doing too well for the past few months. Honestly, more like the past year. There is this dark, angry pessimism inside me that is always under the surface, like groundwater. And the level is rising: I’ve become more snappish and thin-skinned to the point of alienating my own twin. I feel so tired, as if I’ve been swimming upstream for too long.
I’m going to stop trying. I’m going to move into my parents basement. I know at 29 years old this is considered not grown up. But I’m too tired to care. Until I sort out myself I’m just going to stop swimming for a couple years. I’ll drift in the current, and gratefully listen to the birds.